Young Slovaks swiping right, for love and a broken heart
An expert and an older couple offer some advice on relationships.
An elderly couple sit on a bench in the centre of Trnava, a town about 60 kilometres from Bratislava, smiling as they share an ice cream. Mária and Milan Mečír, who have spent 59 joyful years together, are set to celebrate their 60th, or ‘diamond’, wedding anniversary next year.
Their love story began at a dance when Mária was just shy of 19. “A tall man noticed a tall woman,” she recalls with a laugh, glancing at her husband, who smiles and nods. Soon after, they started courting.
An elderly couple from Trnava. (Source: Iryna Uias)Two years later, on September 18, 1965, Mária, then 21, married Milan in Trnava. By the time she was 23, she had given birth to their first daughter. Now, they are the proud grandparents of 10 grandchildren.
Asked about the secret to their long-lasting marriage, Mária grins and says, “We try to understand each other. We may grumble now and then, but we never stay angry.”
Decades on, it’s far more common for young people to meet a potential partner by swiping through dating apps than by striking up a conversation at a party.
Such was the case for Branislav Fábry, a third-year university student, who met his girlfriend on Tinder, a popular dating app. To their surprise, they discovered they were both attending the same university, Ss Cyril and Methodius in Trnava, where The Slovak Spectator spoke to several students about their dating experiences.
University of Ss. Cyril and Methodius in Trnava. (Source: Iryna Uias)After meeting face-to-face, what began as a casual chat soon blossomed into a relationship. While nearly 60 percent of Slovaks aged 15 to 34 have used dating apps to find a partner, according to a 2021 Nielsen Admosphere Slovakia survey, there are many young people who still manage to find love offline. Take Fábry’s classmates, Nika Húsková and Dominik Pokorný, who are both in their early 20s. They met through a mutual friend at their dormitory.
“It was university that brought us together,” Húsková says.
When phones get in the way of love
Dating at university, particularly when two people who have fallen for each other are enrolled at the same institution, offers the benefit of spending more time together on campus. But the question for many students remains: how do you balance studying and dating?
Fábry says he tries to take his girlfriend, who is in a different year, on a proper date a couple of times a month. “We’ll go grab something to eat or attend an event,” he says. He recalls a recent trip to Brno, in the Czech Republic, where he suggested staying in a hotel designed like an atomic bunker. “But my girlfriend wasn’t keen – she was too scared,” Fábry laughs, calling it his dream date.
Couple Húsková and Pokorný. (Source: Nikol Húsková)For classmates Húsková and Pokorný, finding time for each other is easier. “We’re dating during lectures,” jokes Pokorný. Being in the same year allows them to balance their relationship and their studies more seamlessly. During exam season, studying together or quizzing each other often replaces traditional dates.
However, one surprising challenge in modern relationships stems from the very device that often brings people together in the first place – the smartphone. The rise of ‘phubbing’, where someone ignores their partner in favour of their phone, can cast a shadow over even the best-planned date.
Both couples acknowledge that phones can sometimes distract them from meaningful interaction, but they agree it rarely leads to conflict. “We remind each other to focus on the real world rather than the virtual one,” says Pokorný. Husková adds that she’s never felt her boyfriend prioritise his phone over her.
Fábry, on the other hand, is more relaxed about it. “We both do it. I’m used to repeating myself – if she’s not listening, I’ll just come back to the topic and say it again, only shorter.”
Single? You’re good
In an age of social media-driven expectations, finding a partner who respects and understands you – or stays committed – can be challenging. With a world full of opportunities and adventures, many young people may hesitate to settle into long-term relationships, uncertain of what tomorrow might bring.
“It’s better to be single than to be in a relationship just for the sake of it,” says Miriam Tomondyová, a university student. “A lot of people jump into relationships without really knowing who they are or what they want out of life. Everyone needs their space to grow.”
Ema Andrejková, who recently ended a relationship, agrees. She’s enjoying her single status and isn’t in a rush to find a new partner, though she remains open to meeting new people. Her friend Simona Lukáčová takes a similar approach, steering clear of dating apps.
Ema Andrejková and Simona Lukáčová. (Source: Iryna Uias)“I go out enough to meet people naturally,” Lukáčová says.
But not everyone is looking for a conventional relationship these days. Some young people prefer the ambiguity of a “situationship” – a term that’s gained popularity in recent years, describing a relationship that hovers between dating and commitment. However, Zuzana Beneková, a student, no longer supports situationships.
“I’ve been in situationships more than once, and they never ended well. They take the fun out of dating,” Beneková explains.
Unlike “friends with benefits”, which is often more about sex than emotion, situationships prioritise emotions but avoid expectations or labels. For these reasons, a situationship may not work out and can ultimately become painful.
Many young people fear a commitment
Zuzana Juráneková is a specialist adviser at IPčko, a youth internet counselling service that provides free, anonymous psychological and social support. In an interview with The Slovak Spectator, Juráneková revealed that in the first half of 2024, IPčko conducted 82,101 support and crisis communications, with 4.87 percent related to romantic relationships and nearly 4.63 percent focused on peer connections.
“Seventy-two percent of all our support and crisis conversations involve young people under 30,” she noted, highlighting a troubling trend of loneliness that has topped IPčko’s statistics. “Young people often feel isolated, even when they are surrounded by others,” Juráneková explained, identifying a phenomenon that has become increasingly common.
Many young individuals struggle with feelings of inadequacy, believing they don’t meet their partner’s expectations and fearing they could be replaced. This pressure to be “good enough” can lead to a range of psychological issues, including anxiety, stress, depression, self-harm, and even suicidal thoughts. Maintaining balance in a relationship is no small feat; it demands time, energy and patience from both partners. Juráneková emphasised that clear communication is essential for achieving this equilibrium.
“If we have expectations of our partner, it’s vital they know what they are – our dreams, ambitions and desires must be articulated clearly,” the expert advised.
“Relationships give meaning to our lives. As social beings, it is crucial that our relationships are healthy and supportive,” Juráneková concluded.
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